Finding JOY in the JOURNEY...: One Year down...5 Months, 2 weeks and 5 days to go;)

June 21, 2011

One Year down...5 Months, 2 weeks and 5 days to go;)

So...a year ago today...was the 2nd worst day of my life (the FIRST being the day of the accident)! I read my post from a year ago explaining to everyone in my BLOG list where my husband was...you can read that post HERE! I started today off forgetting it was one years since sentencing. What triggered my memory was during my walk this morning, I called to wish Ivana a Happy Birthday. After getting off the phone with her, I remembered that it was also Rachel's Birthday. Then the memory clicked that last year on Rachel's Birthday, she took the day off and came to support Lee and I on the day of his sentencing. And that I needed to send her a thank you/I love you message on Facebook. So that kind of set the tone for today, and I have been "futtless" ever since (futless is a random Laie word that means basically Honory (spelling?) and if you dont know what that means than I cant help you lol). All the memories came flooding back and the feelings came too...the feelings of helplessness, pain, sorrow and shock. What was I going to do without my husband for 18 months? How was he going to survive being in prison for that long? So many things running through my mind...my fears...disappoitments...hurt...pain...and then I started crying. Well more like sobbing. Im sure I was quite a sight...sweaty, red in the face, snot runing down my chin from crying like a baby...all while Kayla was pulling me down Temple road like a rag doll. I finished my two miles, wiped my face and just shut it off...the emotions, tears, pain EVERYTHING. It's like I have a switch and when it gets too pianful I just turn it off and I become numb. I pretty much forgot about that mornings breakdown by the time Lee called me that afternoon. And I was telling him that I was just FUTLESS that day and I couldn't figure out why and then it CLICKED...duh that's why I was feeling this way!!! Then we had a good talk and reminisced how we really didn't know if we'd last a YEAR...and WE HAVE. I was focusing on how miserable last year was and totally ignored at that fact that we are MORE than half way done!!! It just brought everything into perspective to me and suddenly I didn't feel so futless anymore;) This is why we are supposed to be married...this is why I chose Lee...because he helps me see what I can't and won't see when Im in a certaing state of mind. And I do the same for him. Our communication skills have just developed so much over the last year and we have really worked hard to stay connected in our mariage. Life isn't perfect...or easy...or fair but if we are lucky enough to find someone to stick it out with us...through thick and thin...than we are truly blessed. This last year has been a difficult one but I know that by this time next year, I will look back on this year and say WE MADE IT!!! For all of you who have prayerd for us, called, wrote, emailed or lended a shoulder to lean on during this past year THANK YOU...we love and appreciate you more than you ever know.

2 comments:

Janet said...: Just so you know....you are both always in our thoughts and prayers! We love you!!!; 1:26 PM
Emerson Experiment said...: My heart aches for you both as I can't believe you've made it THIS far. There is light at the end of this tunnel, and sis you're approaching the final leg of this journey. Thanks for always being there for me, hope I can be the same to you..Love you Meebs!; 12:09 PM

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Once upon a time...

Mibi grew up in Laie and attended Kahuku High and Lee grew up in Haleiwa and Mililani and attended Mililani High. Mibi went to College at BYU-Hawaii and then served a mission in the Utah Ogden Mission before meeting the man of her dreams. After school, Lee jumped into the workforce looking for his career and eventually ended up working for Mibi's family flower shop at Turtle Bay while Mibi was serving her mission...and never thought that this job would lead him to his "Angel". We met in Septmeber of 2001 after I returned home from my mission. I came back to the flower shop to manage things for my Mom and Lee had left to pursue his education. Well a few months later, Lee's education path didn't take the direction he had hoped and instead life lead him back to Turtle Bay. The first thing he did was call Mom to get his job back and of course she said YES. So, I was Lee's boss and there was an instant friendship...it felt as if we had known each other our entire lives. We kept it strictly business for a few weeks and then one night I was gong to make a Wal-Mart run after work and called him to see if he wanted to come along. His phone was busy (the days before call waiting) and I almost gave up...but after a few more tries he picked up and from that night on we were inseperable. I think we told each other our life stories that night and we both knew then that our lives would never be the same! Over the next year, we formed a deep love and respect for each other which kept us connected through a few rough patches and across the ocean as Mibi moved back to Utah. Finally after a year of being best friends, we both realized that there is no one on earth we would rather be with than each other! We were a couple for about two years when Lee proposed to me and we tied the knot at the exact place we first met...the same hotel the flower shop was located when we worked there...TURTLE BAY. And to add to our JOY, we have a beautiful daughter Savannah (Lee's biological and Mibi's spiritual daughter ) who we just ADORE! She is so smart, funny, outgoing, a jabberbox like her Dad and just the cutest thing you have ever seen!!! We also are praying that we can give her a little brother or sister sometime in the next year or two!!! Until then we have a Doberman (Kayla) and a cat (Shadow) that we spoil rotten and of course all of our Nieces and Nephew's. It has been almost 8 years of wedded bliss and although we have had our ups and downs, each experience has made us grow more in love with each other and are still each others best friend!